mandaaay
Bunter
I buy my shoes at Denny's!
Posts: 89
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Post by mandaaay on Aug 31, 2005 9:43:44 GMT -4
STAY CLEAR OF KILLER BIRDS.....THEY CAN HOLD YOU HOSTAGE WHEN LEAST EXPECTING IT. BE SURE TO ARM YOURSELF WITH APPROPRIATE BIRD DEFLECTING DEVICES AT ALL TIMES! TAKE IT FROM ME IT'S NOT PRETTY AND MAY CAUSE ONE TO BE LATE FOR WORK!!!
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Post by sh3lby on Aug 31, 2005 10:00:30 GMT -4
hmm.. poor birdies.. they're just lonely too!
now, if they're using their insides as projectiles.. well.. that's a whole different kickball game!
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Post by aspey on Aug 31, 2005 12:12:04 GMT -4
Obligatory...
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steveindc
Franchised
"I liked you a lot more when you were funny..."
Posts: 1,235
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Post by steveindc on Aug 31, 2005 13:35:10 GMT -4
Have the birds held you hostage in the phone booth yet Mandy?
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Post by meeeshell on Aug 31, 2005 13:42:26 GMT -4
Here is how the story was relayed to me:
Oh my god I was totally held hostage by a bird this morning.
I am about to walk outside of my building and there stands at the bottom of the steps a HUGE bird—a hawk if you will.
I wonder what the hell I am going to do because this bird may attack me and I will have to go to the hospital for rabies shots…not fun!
So I close the door and think what I can throw at it so it will fly away. I have nothing but tampons in my bag… I get one out and ponder tossing it at it but then realize that really would be stupid and probably won’t work anyway. Still searching for something I decide to use my water bottle and squirt water at it. So I do that and the bird jumps back a few hops and shakes the water off its head but still is looking at me. All in confusion I decide my only weapon is the water so I squirt it again. It now moves back pretty far and I notice a car is coming so it is my chance to make a run for it. With my weapons in hand—in one hand a tampon in the other a water bottle... I run down the steps and jump in the grass. The bird flaps its wings and I am now screaming running with the water and tampon in hand. I finally made it to my car after the five minute debacle.
What a morning.
So anything interesting happen to you today??
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Post by aspey on Aug 31, 2005 14:14:56 GMT -4
I'd suggest forgoing a recap in next week's newsletter, and just sending that in its place. It's much more interesting to read about tampons as weapons of self defense than who kicked a home run.
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mandaaay
Bunter
I buy my shoes at Denny's!
Posts: 89
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Post by mandaaay on Aug 31, 2005 15:08:58 GMT -4
Have the birds held you hostage in the phone booth yet Mandy? Not yet but buddy let me tell you I will be prepared next time... those damn birds won't catch off guard next time. I plan on arming myself with a sling shot to help save myself and others from another horriffic bird hostage experience. WARNING to all I do have tampons and water on my person at all times and I am not afraid to use them if need be!
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Post by sh3lby on Aug 31, 2005 15:10:12 GMT -4
you should of petted him on his widdle birdie head! Perhaps he was just lonely and tired and needed a rest / some water.. water to drink, not thrown at him..
poor guy.. prolly having a birdie breakdown =(
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Post by sh3lby on Aug 31, 2005 15:20:34 GMT -4
WARNING to all I do have tampons and water on my person at all times and I am not afraid to use them if need be! mmm, I love a woman with tampons.. tampons are soooo soft!
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mandaaay
Bunter
I buy my shoes at Denny's!
Posts: 89
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Post by mandaaay on Aug 31, 2005 16:00:10 GMT -4
you should of petted him on his widdle birdie head! Perhaps he was just lonely and tired and needed a rest / some water.. water to drink, not thrown at him.. poor guy.. prolly having a birdie breakdown =( Oh NO that bird was totally evil and was going to attack me to death or give me rabies. Heck that dirty bird should thank me for the free shower... since I used up all my H2O on it.
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mandaaay
Bunter
I buy my shoes at Denny's!
Posts: 89
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Post by mandaaay on Aug 31, 2005 16:04:06 GMT -4
WARNING to all I do have tampons and water on my person at all times and I am not afraid to use them if need be! mmm, I love a woman with tampons.. tampons are soooo soft! Apparently tampons can be used as weapons for real if you catch them on fire and shoot them out a window. It's like a little firecracker!!
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Post by meeeshell on Aug 31, 2005 16:24:10 GMT -4
Obligatory... Aspey, very Fark.
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Post by aspey on Aug 31, 2005 16:31:09 GMT -4
Shhhh... you're not supposed to call me out on it. At least I didn't use slashes.
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Post by meeeshell on Aug 31, 2005 16:45:23 GMT -4
If I had REALLY called you out, I would have used first names. Your secret is safely hidden in your handle.
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steveindc
Franchised
"I liked you a lot more when you were funny..."
Posts: 1,235
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Post by steveindc on Aug 31, 2005 16:50:51 GMT -4
Well tampons do make great Linkin Logs
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